Monday, February 11, 2013

$1 Fish - No Drink

Ok, it wasn't even that late when I left the bar tonight and went to McDonald's, so I can't even use that as an excuse, but I am totally confused by this.

I understand it's Fish and I understand they will take $1USD from me if I order this... but what do I get in return.  Do I get 250 McBites?  I think that may be a very good deal no matter how small the bites are.  Or  do I get 2/12th's of a McBite, in which case I would be disappointed and slightly peeved they just didn't name it The 6th.  And since when do we describe food with a series of numbers and slashes?

I may never know, but it may just be America's answer to £1 fish.

Who knows, it may just catch on...

Drinking Soundtrack of the Week

Thursday of this week is Valentine's Day. If it's a day you look forward to all year long and you made your plans for this night three weeks ago, just stop reading now and click here:

For the rest of us, it is one of those days (second only to New Years Eve) that we wish we could sleep through entirely, waking up only after the last bloodied red-heart Hallmark card and the last piece of Be Mine candy has been stripped off the store shelves.  For the ever single, the newly single, and those that wish they were single - Valentine's Day is just another reminder that conspiracies do exist - and it's hell being the target of one.

One bright spot for me this week was that a podcast I follow, This American Life, played an episode I've heard before but truly love (true love).  It's their Valentine's Day tribute and it covers some very strange aspects of this thing we call love.  Calling it the VDay episode doesn't do it justice so I'm just going to assign my own title to this one and I'm calling it "Five Harvard Physicists Explain Why if You're Alone - You are Not Alone" or "Yes, I've found the perfect person for you - Do you speak Cantonese?"

The podcast is an hour long, but you should at least listen to the prologue, it's only 5 minutes and frames the entire show .  It's excellent.  Listen to it here.


That being said, and since you now know where I'm coming from on this whole VDay thing, my pick for music this week is from Holly Golightly and the Brokeoffs (obscure but talented individuals).  The piece is actually titled Like the Devil Do but this upload has a different title - another song from the same album having something to do with an actual gun law still on the books in the state of Texas, but that is neither here nor there - I hope you enjoy it.

Ain't nobody gonna love me like the devil do,
Ain't nobody gonna love me like the devil do.
You can dunk me in the river, gonna clean my sin,
But you might as well dunk me in a bucket of gin;
Ain't nobody gonna love me like the devil do.

Ain't nobody gonna love me like the devil do,
Ain't nobody gonna love me like the devil do.
I got me drunk on whiskey, drunk on wine--
The Lord don't like it but the devil don't mind;
Ain't nobody gonna love me like the devil do.

Now, that's the inside of a Hallmark card I would buy!


Not that I'm bitter, but this is what I'll be drinking on the 14th.

The Historical Inebriant: Effin Broken Heart Cocktail

Some Effin Vodka
Some Effin ice
An Effin glass

Find a proportion of the above ingredients that insures you having a good time on the 14th!


With so many playlists out there for VDay I thought I'd come up with a Love Gone Bad One 

14 For the 14th

In no particular rhyme, reason, or order (except sex) - cause that’s how love is

For the Girls

I Hate Myself for Loving You - Joan Jett  
Blow Me  - Pink
Before He Cheats - Carrie Underwood
I Will Survive - Gloria Gaynor
Hit Me with Your Best Shot - Pat Benatar
Sleeping with a Broken Heart - Alicia Keys
Irreplaceable - Beyonce
Someone Like You - Adele
Since you been Gone - Kelly Clarkson
I Will Always Love You - Whitney Houston
We Found Love in a Hopeless Place - Rihanna
What’s Love Got to Do With It - Tina Turner

Unbreak My Heart - Toni Braxton
All the Single Ladies - Beyonce

For the Boys

Ex girl to the Next Girl - gang starr
Somebody That I Used to Know - Gotye
Freebird - Lynard Skynard
This could be the last time - Rolling Stones
You Give Love A Bad Name – Bon Jovi
Would I lie to You - Eurythmics
Good Lovin Gone Bad - Bad Company
One More Night - Phil Collins
Already Gone - Eagles
Love Stinks - J. Geils Band
Every Rose Has Its Thorn - Poison
No, Woman No Cry - Bob Marley
Shot to the Heart - Bon Jovi,  Lil' Wayne and Rick Ross
Don’t Come around here no more - Tom Petty

To view previous Drinking Soundtrack of the Week posts, click Here.

Sunday, February 10, 2013

The Prodigal Son foretells the Impending Zombie Apocolypse, and YOLO is my mantra

When I was growing up in New York State, (where the bars are open till 4am) I remember returning home from a late night at sometimes 5 or 6am and my father, standing in the doorway, would always greet me with the phrase "Well, the Prodigal Son has finally returned home!"

For so many years, I never really understood what he meant, but in writing this post (my first since December 9th) I may have a sense of what that son felt returning home.  I apologize for my wandering from this blog, and I now return home to repent my wasteful ways (prodigal means wasteful I found out today) and pray that my sins have been forgiven - if only until I wander away again.

File:Pompeo Batoni 003.jpg
The Return of the Prodigal Son (1773) by Pompeo Batoni

To catch up a bit, apparently the world did not end in December of last year.  Much hype was again for naught.  I must say it's always a bittersweet moment for me when the world doesn't end.  It's not that I believe any of the doomsday notions to begin with, but they serve as such good background for jokes...and of course drinking parties.  YOLO becomes a toast for a round of shots because of course you only live once and the world ends tomorrow!  Of course, at 10 minutes to midnight on the 20th, I admit I did have that fleeting thought of "What if the crazies are right and tomorrow is the last day...I am so totally screwed!"

So I don't believe we should have a year where the destruction of our planet is not on anyone's calendar, and although I have not researched it thoroughly, I'm not aware of one for 2013.  But I did hear about a comet that will pass very close to earth at the end of this year.  While it will not strike us, it may make for quite a viewing event on or about November 28th.

David Lillo / AFP - Getty ImagesComet McNaught shines above Chile in 2007.

The online images of previous comets reminds me of a campy movie that I saw once called Night of the Comet.  In it, a comet passes very close to us and when the Earth passes through the gases of the comet's tail, the vapors turn almost everyone on the planet into...what else, Zombies.

You can read the IMDb review here, but if you have a chance to see it please do.  November 28th is a Thursday so it's a good night to stay at home, bolt the doors, mix up some beverages and watch a good flick, cause remember - you only live once, and tomorrow you just may be a Zombie.


To view a previous post on the Zombie Cocktail as well as a drinking soundtrack, go Here.

For more on Comet ISON (or as I like to call it, the Death Star) See Here.

If you want to get a sense of the movie on the small screen before you Netflix it, there are some uploads on YouTube.